Ice Storm Warning

My morning routine this past 8 days has involved checking the Fort Leonard Wood website to see what the weather is like. Imagine my feeling of despair this morning when I logged on to see a big Ice Storm Warning at the top of the page with clickable link to tell you how to be prepared. I hope that the powers that be take into consideration that some of those boys, like mine, are complete and total desert rats and don't know what to do in an ice storm. I'm very worried.

Happy Birthday!

It's my amazing SB's 14th birthday! Happy Birthday to my darling girl, who daily grows more beautiful and wonderful to me!

Tragedy Tomorrow, Comedy Tonight!

Anyone know what my title is from?? I know Rochelle probably knows it, but anyone else?

My dream in life, besides being a mommy, was to be an actress. I acted through high school and college. I was very good. Drama coaches from both high school and college encouraged me to pack my bags and head to New York. Many thought I had enough talent to make it there.
Life interrupted, as it is known to do, in the form of a bouncing baby boy. I've never looked back. This was my calling and I've loved it.

Many actors will tell you that comedy is a much harder acting genre than drama. I believe that is because comedic timing is something you are born with. Sure, it can be fine tuned, but really, you either have a sense of timing or you don't. I did. I played dramatic roles, ala Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, but my moments of genius often came in comedic form. In college I played the role of Sophia in a Neil Simon comedy called Fools. It was my finest hour. I had audience members compare my comedic timing to that of Gracie Allen. No kidding. I really did. I am, in my heart, a comedic actress. My ambition, my dream, is to someday return to some kind of acting. My kids are getting to the age where I think I can start to look at something for myself in the next few years.

BUT, the point of this post was not to talk about my dream. That information was really a background for what I witnessed last night. SB was cast in a little murder mystery dinner at our church. My sweet, quiet, often shy little girl was cast as the sheriff in this whacko play. Her character name? Hugh Jass. She wore huge pants stuffed with a pillow, along with a sheriffs jacket and hat, and some mighty cool shades. She not only looked hysterical, she WAS hysterical. The girl got some mighty big laughs. She has the comedic timing in her blood as well. And I never realized it until last night. She was so funny. And able to poke fun at herself and do the kind of physical comedy that is hard for kids her age because they are so self-conscious. And, as goofy as the show was, my heart was filled to bursting. Because I don't dance like she does. I sing and she doesn't really like to. But this? This I know. And this I see as being something she maybe got a little of from me. And that is an awesome thing to see.

In other news, Bubba called again tonight! His basic training is set to start on Monday, so after that I'm sure we won't be getting as many calls, but I'm taking what I can get. He did something to help out a drill instructor today, so he was rewarded with a 10 minute call. The kids and I were at dance, so he talked briefly to each of his sibs and a couple of minutes with me. The food was better today apparently, and he's had about 8 glasses of milk today. One thing about him being at basic training is that at least the Federal Government gets to pay for him to eat for a while!lol!

Bonus!

Bubba called today! He got to make a 5 minute call as they are still in processing and haven't started basic. He said the food is horrible and they are taking away his contacts and making him wear glasses, but he's okay so far. No one has been mean yet since they haven't really started. He thinks it will be 5 days or so until he can call again, but I was starting to fall apart when the phone started ringing. I think God knew I needed to hear from my boy!

Hanging in there...

First of all, thank you to my friends, whose calls, emails, texts and in person caring have made all the difference today. I appreciate you all more than you will ever know.

Bubba has made is safely to Missouri, or, as he put it after stepping into the 17 degree weather, The Great State of Misery! He's on a bus to base right now. It's been a long day, as we dropped him off at the processing center at 5:30 this morning. Luckily, he has had his phone all day, so I've been kept up to date on the goings on. He's called a bunch. He's missing us already, and we him. And I'm really sad about when he gets to base in the next hour and loses his phone. And I don't know when I'll get to talk to him again.

The other kids are having a hard time as well. He put them all to bed last night and came out crying each time. It's hard to see my big, burly boy crying. I just pray the time goes quickly.

It's a bi-polar weekend!

This weekend has been filled with crying, laughing, joy and sadness.

We had a fun night out with some friends on Friday and a fun party for SB and Bubba on Saturday.
There were many emotions during the football game yesterday, as I dare say my youngest son might be the biggest Cardinals fan ever. He, even at 10, takes his football incredibly seriously. I'm happy for him and his daddy that their years long devotion to this team has finally paid off. I always root for the Cards as well, but I've learned over the years not to get my hopes up!lol! My boys, all three of them, have never quite learned to distance themselves, and, this year, that is okay! The Superbowl should be entertaining. I have a deep seated, life long hatred of the Pittsburgh Steelers. Should be an interesting game!

Bubba leaves tomorrow. At 5:30 AM we have to drop him at the processing center down town. The weekend has had that shadow looming for all of us. My SB is having a terrible time of it. Mark is dealing with most of her emotion as I am just not really feeling able to help her when I am so overwhelmed myself. We're all home today, Mark included, so we'll just be spending the day as a family. I know he'll be back, that this isn't the end of the world, but it is, in some respects, the end of the life we've known for the last many years. Even when he comes back, I can't see things being the same. He'll have been away for 5 or more months. He will be a different person, with different perspectives. This letting go stuff really stinks.

Burn, Baby, Burn

I was on the phone with my MIL this morning. I haven't talked to her for a while as she's been going through some stuff and I was much enjoying the conversation. I heard my cell phone ring with the special ring tone assigned to a specific group of friends, but didn't answer as I was on the other line. Then the call waiting on my home phone starts beeping, but I ignore that as well since I figured it was the same person. Then the ring tone on my cell again, but still I ignored. I finished my call with my MIL and then looked at the caller ID, but also saw there was a voice mail. I called and the tone of the message was brusque and a "this is business, call me back". This particular friend works at my kids school, so I dialed her back, thinking someone was in trouble, but who could it be and what could they have done. No such luck. As it turned out SB had spilled sodium hydro chloride on her arm during a science lab and was being treated, after a call to poison control, for a chemical burn. I headed to the school, in full blown panic attack mode, trying to reach friends or husband on the phone to talk me through the trip to school, but no such luck. Finally, I reached my friend the nurse, who talked me down off the ledge and offered to go to urgent care with me and SB, but she needed to take care of an appointment for her daughter first and then would meet me there. I got to school, found SB and the friend who had called me to let me know about the incident. We waited some more time for SB's arm to be under running water (it needed 45 minutes) and my friend stayed and talked with me. She knew I needed her. After the running water was done, we walked back to the main office to get insurance forms and such. As we were standing in the office, good my other good friend(the newly reblonded!) walks in and tells me that my friend the nurse is on her way to go with me to the ER or urgent care or whatever and that SHE is going to take nurse friends daughter to her appointment so that nurse friend can go with me. I was overwhelmed. I don't handle medical emergencies with my children well and I am panicky by nature and they all three know that. The fact that they all were trying to be there and hold my hand, literally and emotionally was beyond my ability to comprehend. I am blessed beyond belief with not only these friends, but my BFF and my friend bass girl as well. Truly blessed.

SB is fine by the way!lol! We went to the Dr., as per poison control. We are treating it as you would any other burn unless it blisters, which it does not look like it will at this point!

The Big 4-0!

Today is my 40th birthday. I was anticipating feeling very morose about it, and actually had been right up until I got up this morning. I woke up really happy, and my day got better and better!
Mark brought me flowers and balloons and my favorite little breakfast treat. I took the kids to school and had a planning meeting for the 8th grade graduation at our school. During the meeting, my lovely friends brought me a cupcake cake and some "40 is so old" paraphernalia and sang to me. Afterwards, two of my friends took me to lunch!
Tonight we're going to my favorite Mexican food restaurant before SB has dance and then after dance, home for cake!

I do have to tell you about my VERY favorite birthday gift! My BFF made me some music CDs entitled "The 40 Greatest Hits of Your Life". There is a song from every year since the year I was born, including her own liner notes! She wrote trivia facts about the song, or why it was special, etc. SO COOL!! The first song, released in 1969 is "Sweet Caroline" by Neil Diamond. I don't know if I've ever talked to her about that song, but there would be no better song to start the CD with. That song belongs on the soundtrack of my childhood as my parents were huge fans of Neil Diamond and listened to him constantly. It brings back tons of memories. As do many of the songs on the CDs. Amazing!

Family Pictures

We had portraits taken a couple of weeks ago and they turned out wonderfully! I wanted to make sure we got them done before Bubba left and the photographer was so accommodating, working for us even though she normally doesn't work over the holidays. Thank you, Amy!

Pain!

It's 2:30 in the morning and I'm up because I am in so much pain I can't sleep. It started Friday night as we left dinner with Mark's family. Just an achy feeling in a specific tooth. When I woke up yesterday it was much worse. I wasn't able to chew and my face hurt. I was able to get in with a dentist who is open all day on Saturday and I have a huge infection in the root and nerve area of a particular tooth, which needs a root canal. They started the process today, gutting the tooth and getting the meds in it to kill the infection. I have antibiotics and narcotic pain relievers, but I have already taken too many of the pain killers, so I can't take anymore until 7AM. I hate tooth pain, since it seems to affect the whole face. It hurts so badly. I'm just counting the hours until I can take some more meds, and hopefully the antibiotics will start to kick in and kill the infection...

Why on Earth

Does every damned thing have to be a competition? Living, loving, grieving, mourning, parenting, the intelligence/athleticism/kindness of our children, helpfulness or lack thereof of our husbands, busyness, richness, poorness, etc., etc., etc. I'm so tired of all the one-ups-man ship. UGH! Can't we all just be supportive of one another?

They Actually Did the RIGHT thing!

When I saw my Doctor in December, he sent me for an xray of my spine/hip. He gave me two separate referrals, saying the he really wanted me to go to place A, but he wasn't sure they took my insurance, so to call and if they wouldn't see me, go to place B. Well, of course, place A was not contracted with my insurance, so I went to place B. I've been there before. I had no problems. They took my insurance card, had me fill out paperwork, did the xray, the end. Until last Wednesday, when i got the EOB from my insurance saying they were denying the claim, as place B was not a contracted provider. I had to make a call to the referral specialist at my Dr.'s office anyway, (and she and I are great phone buddies by this time!) so I ask her to look into it. She calls me back today finally and says that place B had not been contracted with my insurance since October. WHY did they take my card and see me then??? She has no idea, but has been having some problems with them anyway. As I have no out of network benefit on my sucky insurance, and it was place B's fault, I had no recourse as far as the insurance paying for it. The only thing that could really be done would be for place B to file an appeal with the insurance, but it was unlikely to be granted since they knew they were not contracted when they saw me. My referral coordinator was going to call Place B and talk to them, but she really wasn't holding out much hope and it looked like I was going to be stuck with the $285 bill for my xrays.
BUT, when she called Place B, they miraculously claimed FULL responsibility and are writing off the bill in full!!! Thank goodness!! I won't go back to place B in the future if I can avoid it, but at least they did the right thing!

The Circle of Life

That song is stuck in my head today as last night we saw The Lion King musical. It was fabulous! It was so beautifully done and kept my children enthralled. Even Bubba didn't complain too much afterwards! We met up with my brother for my birthday dinner (not actually my birthday until next week, but we couldn't get tickets for the actual date!) before hand, and it was a fun celebration to end what has been an entirely too stressful beginning to my year.
We've had some issues with some things happening to our house (that ended up being easily fixed, but had visions of tens of thousands of dollars running through my head for days on end), some car drama (that did take up a bunch of cash, but should be done for a while), and some other minor things that, when added to the major things, made me very stressed out. Everything basically came to a conclusion yesterday afternoon, so I was able to relax and really enjoy the time out with my family. I needed it!

How I Love Her

My teenaged daughter told me today she had a song she wanted me to listen to, that it was written for us. We listened to it on the way to church this afternoon. I sobbed, which is not unusual. But she sobbed too, which is. She's not a cryer, at least not over movies(except that damned Marley and Me) or songs, but this song was just the most perfect to sum up our relationship, and we've been through every single thing in it. And I'm proud that my almost 14 year old thinks that way. I looked back at her while we were listening and both crying and she grabbed my hand and looked at me with the same love and adoration she looked at me with when she was little. And my heart just melted. How did I get so lucky??

Happy New Year!

We are still in cocooning mode over here, but I wanted to pop in to say Happy New Year to all! Many, many blessings to all of you!
I'll be back when the kiddos are back to school and Mark is back to work.
See you then!