Earlier this evening I was thinking about a post I was going to write about what a silly mom I am. The Teenager left to go on a retreat with the church youth group this afternoon and I was crying as I helped him get his stuff out of the van. I didn't know why I was crying. Of course I was going to miss him, but I rarely see him much on the weekends anyway. He actually hugged me...twice...in front of his friends before he left. Because he too was feeling that something was not right. Well, it seems I'm not so silly after all. My son called me to tell me that the bus was involved in an accident. Fatal to one or more people in the other vehicle. None of the kids were hurt, thank God. The kids had to wait a while to be transferred to another bus and then another. My son was tired and hungry and very quiet when I picked him up. He hugged me a lot. He hugged his Papa and all his siblings when he got home. He went to bed very early and had me come sit on his bed and talk to him before he went to sleep. He asked me to leave his light on when I left even though he was going to sleep. He wanted his door left open. This boy, my first born, is my heart. He is one of my five reasons for being and I don't know what I would do without him. I'm so grateful that I don't have to find out.
Karinhas started some Friday fun. Here's my story...
I worked as a waitress in my early 20's, including when I was pregnant with The Teenager and after he was born. I went back to work when he was six weeks old. It was my first day back. I was still nursing. I worked a lunch shift at Coco'sback in the day when the servers wore patchwork skirts and white peasant blouses. We were really busy that day for lunch and I was running like crazy. I was standing at a table taking an order when I happened to look down at my blouse and see a wet spot that was getting larger and then realized there was one on the other side as well. I was LEAKING breastmilk! At work. While I was taking an order! I hurriedly excused myself from my customers and ran back to my manager's office. A man. Without children. I had to ask him for a new blouse. I was mortified. But not as mortified as I was when I walked back onto the floor and he said loudly, in front of all the other servers, "Can't you get a clothes pin for those things?".
The Princess really delights in the every day. It does not take much to make her happy. Today's joy? Discovering that there is pink milk. The character on a showshe loves drinks pink milk and today she asked me if there really was such a thing and could we get some. So when we were at the store we bought strawberry milk mix. I made it for her at lunch and she laughed and laughed and drank it up. It was the highlight of her day for sure!
for this. This was my absolute favorite toy in the world. No one I've asked has ever heard of it. I've been looking for one for a year or so and now to find a never opened box...I'm stalking the auction...but I'll do what it takes. This toy will be MINE!
I practically lived with my Grandmother and Grandfather for much of my childhood. My mother was young and single when she had me and went back to work when I was 2 weeks old and my Grandmother took care of me. She was the light of my life. She really could have been my mother as she had just turned 40 when I was born. Until the day she died, a little over 3 years ago, I truly thought she was immortal. She would never die and leave me. I was wrong... When she died, her body was donated to The University of Arizona Medical School. So, not only did she leave me, she left me no place to visit with her. Until now.
The year before I was born my Grandmother bought a couch at garage sale for $25. She had it reupholstered and it was in her formal living room for my whole life. I slept on it sometimes when I spent the night if there wasn't a bed available. I sat with my Grandmother on it and heard stories. I spent much time with my Grandmother on this couch. It was my very favorite thing of my Grandmother's. It had been recovered a couple of times and still sat in her living room when she died. My Grandparents divorced when I was 12 and my Grandmother remarried. Several years before she died my Grandmother began making plans for her "stuff". I disliked this conversation and thought it was pointless as she was never going to die. The only thing I ever said was that I would love to have the couch. After my Grandmother died I helped her husband out a lot, doing various errands for him and such, but then we had a falling out. We did not speak for several months and he died in July. He willed one item to anyone in my Grandmother's family, which includes 4 living children and many grandchildren. The couch...To me. This couch where I spent so much time communing with my favorite person in the world is coming home to me where it will sit in my living room and give me a place to visit my Grandmother until I see her again. Thank you Grandma.
One of my very favorite books in the entire world is Where the Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak. I quote it to my children, often. so much so that when The Princess was about a year old and started talking, she would finish the last word and as she got older the last sentence and now she'll say the whole passage that I love the most. She also sings "Wild Thing". It's just so appropriate because she is my wild thing. She's the baby of four plus the baby of the cousins and when she was born I also cared for several older children, so she's just the baby and has been babied and spoiled. And I know she's a handful. And I know she seems out of control sometimes, but she's just so intense in everything she does. She is intense in her loving, in her playing, in her happiness and in her upset. She just wants to squeeze things, babies and puppies included because she loves them so. But you know what? She's my joy, my happiness, my sunshine. Even if she's a hurricane, she's my hurricaneand I wouldn't trade her for anything. I love you Princess!
My back has been hurting lately. A lot. I know what's causing it, or at least what's aggravating it. I've gained weight. A lot of weight. 30 pounds in the last year. 30 pounds that I worked really hard to lose the year before. I need to lose it again. I am so mad at myself for gaining it back. I understand that I will need to be vigilant about maintaining my weight for the rest of my life. I can't just work to lose it and then let it go again. So, I'm back on the wagon, which for me consists of Weight Watchersandsome exercise. This morning I got up and did Pilates before everyone else got up. While I know that Pilates is not really going to work as my only exercise, I love the way it makes me feel, so I will be using it as a tool. I'm supposed to be walking with my friendtwice a weekas well. Hopefully the stars will align and we'll be able to get started this week. I really want to work on losing this weight and I know there are methods to get if off faster but this method worked for me before and it really is about being healthy for me not just about being thin. I'm going to check in here on Mondays and let you know how I'm doing!
Since the hubby and The Future Engineer, my 7 year old, are off camping this weekend and The Teenager uses this house mainly as a rest stop on the weekends, my girls and I have had a weekend to just be girls. We started with the girl's nighton Friday. Then yesterday we had lunchwith my mom and went shopping. We are getting ready to do some remodeling on our bathroom and we needed to pick out a shower curtain to match our paint to. We spent several hours watching Gilmore Girls Season 3 on DVD which we borrowed from the library and was due yesterday. We haven't finished it though and 7 people are waiting in the hold line for one copy, so if we turn it back in it'll be months before we get it back! We'll try to finish today. Then The Princess had what will likely be her last bath in our old bathtub since some demolition in the bathroom begins today! There were TONS of bubbles. What started out as mommy blowing bubbles off her hand to make The Princess laugh turned into an all out bubble was which left all three of us very wet and soapy. A great time was had by all. The Princess said "That was the most fun ever!" We ended our night with more Gilmore Girls and polishing fingernails and toes with the softest pink polish and braiding freshly washed hair. It was really nice to just have my girlies here and get to be with them. This morning we'll be having some chocolate for breakfast and cleaning the scrapbooking stuff off of the table where it has been sitting since Friday! I've had a great time with my girls but I'm ready for the other half of my family to be home!
Last night, Karin, (along with Baby Girl, of course!) Rochelle, and my lovely sister-in-law joined my girls and me for a girl's night. Karin wanted to learn to scrapbook to create a memory album of her mom for Baby Girl. We had so much fun! The Princess gave Baby Girl an inkling of what it would be like to have a big sister. I don't think she minded too much. She actually seemed to enjoy most of it! We had lots of food and LOTS of laughter. It always occurs to me after a night like this just how important our female friendships are and how often we don't make the time to just be together. We will do this more often. It is my new found mission to make sure not too much time goes by before we do this again!
I'm really asking for some answers here, so feel free to offer advice!
The teenager is 15. He has lots of friends and they all hang out on the weekends and want to do things, movies, bowling etc. Many of his friends are older than he is since he is among the youngest for his grade, so some have jobs and some of them just have parents who give them money every time they want to do something. I've heard that some places will hire at 15 and he really has been looking for a job, applied several places, but hasn't found anything yet.
My question is this...How much money is a reasonable amount for a teenager to have? He gets an allowance and can earn money for extra chores if he chooses to, but he's always asking for an advance on the extra chores and then not getting around to doing them. I want him to be able to do things with his friends. I grew up with a single mom and we had NO money. I never want my kids to feel like I did, but I don't know what is reasonable to expect for us to finance. I really want for him to learn some financial responsibility.
I know this is convoluted, but I'm really struggling to find an appropriate solution to this.
at least not for The Princess.Today we were walking through Costco and she was sitting in the cart next to the baby that I care for during the day and I hear her singing a new little made-up song..."Don't worry, you're almost as pretty as me...almost, almost, alllllmmoooooossssttt!"
Is it that it's okay for the teacher of the child I pick up from Kindergarten to consistently bring the children out 10-15 minutes late, but if I were to be 10-15 minutes late every day I'm sure she would have a talk with me about it. I'm too nervous to actually not show up until 10 minutes after the dismissal time because one day she was out at 2 minutes after. One day. Out of 5 weeks of school...
Overheard this past weekend while I was getting my hair done: The stylist next to mine was VERY pregnant and due in October, which she had obviously planned. "People who have babies in Arizona in the summer time are abusing their children. It is so hot. How could you bring a little tiny baby in to the world when you couldn't even take them out anywhere. It's so dangerous and I just don't think it should be allowed." I know, I know, you're thinking "How could you have not said anything to her? You, the mom with three summer babies?" Well, first of all, I was laughing too hard to speak and secondly someone that stupid is not going to understand one syllable that comes out of my mouth, so why bother wasting my breath!
the eldest, who, since I do not want to share names, will be called The Social Butterfly, is such a blessing to me. She really is. She's been invited to yet another in the endless round of birthday parties that she gets invited to. She's a really nice girl and is friends with everyone, so she gets invited to tons of birthday parties. I think this is the fourth since school started a month ago. Well, the boys are going to be camping this weekend for Cub Scouts and she decided she would rather stay home. With me. To have a girl's weekend with me and The Princess. She makes my heart soar.
I let the teenager stay home from school today. There were some vague rumblings about not feeling well this morning and while I am usually a pretty strict mom about things like this (Do you need to go to the emergency room? No? Then go to school!) and I know he was well enough to go to school, he has been doing REALLY well this year. I mean better than he's done since 5th grade and I just thought he could use a break. I know I need a break every once in a while, so why not a 15 year old? Did your mom ever let you take mental health days or do you or will you allow your children to?
The Princess, who turned 4 last week, is learning letter sounds. she really wants to read. I like to make the letter sounds practical and things she can relate to instead of just doing worksheets. It's letter C week and what better way to celebrate the letter C than with cookies! Check out the baking princess in my photos!
So, last night was the bigopening at the new $98 million dollar Mesa Arts Center. We were given free tickets that were normally priced at $285 per person. While we really had a lovely time, there's not much I think is worth that much money.
I went and had my hair done and got a manicure and a pedicure at the insistence of Karin. My daughter helped me pick out a dress, the price of which would have fed my family of 6 well for 2 weeks. Ahh, the price of beauty! First was an hors d'oeuveres reception. Can anyone say sushi? Because I cannot without gagging. I think I ate a piece of shrimp. I mean it, one piece of cold shrimp. Not my kind of food at all! We then moved on to a second theater (there are 4 in this building) for a dessert reception. Now this I could handle! Chocolate covered strawberries, little pastries, all manner of candies and tarts and generally yummy stuff. I tried a lot of it because I had eaten exactly one. piece. of. shrimp. Ahhh...but the stuff dreams are made of...the chocolate martini! Heaven in a glass. I never drink, not on principle, just based on several years of too many weekend parties in college, so this was a departure for me, but YUM! After the dessert reception, we went in to a concert by Michael Crawford, the original Phantom of the Opera. After much patting on the back of the Mesa Arts staff and contributers, Hugh Downs introduced Michael Crawford. He was very funny. Told some amusing anecdotes from his years in theater. Sang some lovely songs. I don't care for his style, but he was not bad to listen to. And the 60-ish year old women in front of us definitely thought he was the Cat's Meow. Groupies I tell you! If they had been a bit closer, I do think they would have been throwing bras on the stage! The event was really lovely and it was so much fun to get dressed up and go out with my hubbie. I never go to these kind of things with him, but I had been dying to see this particular building. I wanted to see what $98 million buys these days! Pictures of us are on my photo page. Follow the link in the sidebar. My mother took the pictures, so they are ummm....interesting. I haven't quite figured out how she got the shadows, but you get the idea!
I must preface my little story by first saying that in the chaos that is my life, I somehow managed to lose my bank card on Wednesday. since we do not carry any credit cards other than that one, we're working on a cash or check only basis for the next 7-10 days. This is proving challenging for me!
Anyway, yesterday I called the eye doctor to order new contacts for my eldest child. Following is my conversation with the receptionist:
R: Okay, that will be $90, how did you want to pay for that? Me: I'll pay for them when I come to pick them up. R: Well, they really won't order them until you pay for them. Me: So, I have to pay with a credit card over the phone? R: Yes.
This is what I don't get. If my only option to pay for them is using a credit card, why did she ask me how I wanted to pay for them??
Does anyone else find shopping at the home improvement store where they wear the orange vests as annoying as I do? No one knows anything!! We went tonight to order a whirlpool tub. Because we want a 6 foot one, it's a special order item. Well, first of all, no one could answer a question about a certain feature on the tub, but we could call the tub manufacturer tomorrow to find out. Okay, fine, we'll order without the feature. It wasn't a big deal. So, how much to have it delivered to our house instead of picking it up? Ummm...No one knows. One guy thinks maybe $20. The girl thinks its free, the other guy says we can call the manufacturer in the morning to find out, another guy says it's like $200! Finally, with my oh so special talent of reading upside down I see that it is printed in the book that the workers are using to try to order our tub, on every page. On every single page it says it's $60 to deliver it to our house, but not one of these people knew that. I am not confident here. When I finally said that I couldn't believe how little they all knew, the girl says, "well, usually the kitchen people handle this" Oh, I'm sorry, I thought by going to the SPECIAL ORDER DESK I was doing the right thing. ARRRGHHHH!!!
I love my mom friends. By this I actually mean the moms of my kids' friends. Having four children, all involved in at least one activity apiece, it is sometimes impossible for me to get everyone everywhere they need to be at the right time. This is where the joy of mom friends comes in. I have a group of at least 6 women whom I know I can call during the day and ask them to pick up or drop off or hang with my kid(s) until I can get where I need to be. And the same goes for them. If my cell rings at 3:15, I'm pretty sure it's a mom friend needing me to pick her kiddo up and drop her at gymnastics or pick up a high school aged kiddo and bring them to the elementary school. It never bothers me and I'm pretty sure the other moms feel the same way. It's just what moms do!Thank you to all my mom friends!
This morning I was emailing Karin an anecdote about something that had happened and she said "If you had a blog, that would be a great blog entry". It's not as though I haven't thought about it, but you know, as much as I enjoy reading other people's blogs, I don't think I'm a talented enough writer to keep people entertained. So, I'm going to give this a try, but optimistic I am not!
I was thinking as well that in my life I know two types of people. Those who blog (all two of you!) and those who have no idea what a blog is or why on earth you would want to write about your life for other people to read. Since most everyone I know falls into the latter category, I don't think I'll be sharing this with most of them for a while, if ever!
I'm a SAHM to 4 kiddos. They are Bubba-18, The Social Butterfly-14, The Future Engineer-10, and The Princess-7. I've been happily married to my high school sweetheart for 15 years. I really love my life!
